Imago Dei: My small ode to AAPI heritage month

To my beautiful Asian brothers & sisters who live in a reality that demands so much of them - as women, as exotified, orientalized play-things, as fobbish, American, American-ish, wife, wife-to-be, -- should be, can't be, single & seeking, single & not seeking; As men, too feminine, too slim, too small, too short, emasculated, Jackie Chan look-a-like, must have a black belt; daring-to-dream big, pushing the boundaries of your culture - their culture, standing on shoulders of immigrant legacies daring to dream for pies in the sky, never catching a break, meeting standards and expectations, upholding roles and traditions, breaking tradition, making new traditions while trying to keep honor and avoid shame. Believing in your strength and capacity without disrespecting your elders. No one pausing to ask if you're okay. Buzzing forward at 10,000 mph, attempting perfection. In everything. Teetering between two worlds. Tottering between glimmering new horizons & beautiful, must-be-preserved customs. Forgetting parts of yourself to fit in. Rejecting parts of yourself to make it.

Breathe. Remember to choose yourself.

The self that feels complete. 

Pizza-eating, kimchi-munching, Asian-sitting, not-Harvard-bound, basket-ball loving self.

You are Imago Dei. Beautiful. Just as you are.

No less. No more.

All those voices will be there when you return to the mire.

Hold tight to your soul, lest you become only but a shadow of your true self.

It can take years to recover the pieces.

It can take decades to render the original canvas and know what it once was and is meant to be.

Breathe. Remember to choose yourself.

The self you know is 100%

Fork-only-eating, Taglish-only-speaking, Westernized, male Feminist, progressive self.

You are Imago Dei. Beautiful. Just as you are. 

No less. No more. 

Rend your soul from the grasp of those who give nary a glance at the precious cargo they've taken hold of. Who consume you and discard you. Who know you, but don't know YOU. Whose conscience is dim to the glorious readable chapters of your novel. Not just the chapters of the "American Dream" saga, where you can read about Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Lucy Liu, Harold & Kumar, the art of telemarketing and eating dog. It includes the appendix citing Japanese Internment, Domestic Worker exploitation, Refugee status, Aloo Gobi, 1947 Partition, Fish sauce & Dinogoan, Hawaii's illegal annexation, Comfort women & Islamophobia. It includes the footnotes about bi-cultural identity in a hyper-racialized world, intersectionality, and what the acronym AAPI stands for. 

Choose yourself.

Imago Dei.

Beautiful.

Just as you are.

In honor of AAPI Heritage month

Inspired by Kathy Khang's blog post:

http://www.kathykhang.com/2016/05/19/mental-health-aapi-awareness-month/#comment-3452

A candid moment...

alartdesign.com

"Oh soul wrapped tightly in a bosom discouraged.
Wanting for hope and desolate in a placid external reality.
Inside, the storm rages, wailing for a touch from God.
I will not forsake thee. I will tread on with your promises.
Do I not still taste food fit for a king?
Do I not still sleep in a warm bed?
Your provision glares like the sun.
Pray-tell my ravaged soul of your promises oh Lord.
My lips can barely utter the shame of doubt which troubles me.
I will not forsake thee.
Though my heart pries itself from within your grasp, I will not forsake thee.
For I have tasted the fragile whims of earthly comfort.
It has wrought nothing but emptiness and conviction.
I hunger for you again, to be cherished;content within the fold of your hand
despite myself."

A Modern Psalm 2013

showyourhope.com

Life in Haiku

Hello friends, 

A lighter post is due. This will be my attempt to not be so intense for once! Maybe. You tell me what you think. I'm taking a break from my love of spoken word and revisiting my AP English days and trying out Haiku. I'm the type of person that loves being presented with minimal resources and given a task to create something incredible out of very little. For example: I'll sometimes fly home to California with the bare necessities, a pair of jeans, a skirt and 3 shirts. I'll find a way to turn 2 outfits into 7 and still look faaaaabulous! :) 

www.laimyours.com

The haiku traditionally consists of 17 syllables, 3 lines of 5 syllables, 7 syllables & finally, 5 syllables. These rules don't have to be strictly followed as you'll probably notice in my own work. I'm a pretty gregarious person so to be challenged to convey life, thought and profundity (yep, I totes used that word) in almost just one breathe or moment is an awesome challenge. But it's been a super-gratifying hour of reflection, creativity, and processing. 

I've been in California on business and pleasure for the last few days. It's been a slew of visits, mileage, airplanes, cars and people. But it's good to be back on old stomping grounds. That's right. I may be turning into a Bloomington townie, but I'll always be a valley girl. 93257 for life!!!

A few notes on the Haiku experience and my pieces:

1. They are purely objective. 

2. My job is to show. Not tell.

3. These aren't in any chronological order. 

4. Interact! Let me know which ones you enjoyed, respond with your own Haiku, ask me your questions.

5. Refer to this great Haiku writing guide if you don't know where to start: How to Haiku!

Even if you don't want to respond with your own haiku, you should try an hour of expressing your life and experiences in this way. I hope you find it as gratifying as I did. You could totally zen out the whole experience by finding a spot to disappear and be undisturbed. Yoda style. 

www.charmedyoga.com

(I've changed the settings on posting comments so you should be able to post now.) 

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Energy and peace!

Mint, cream and coffee entwined.

My sip of comfort. 

Unbridled freedom.

A scripture coated in ink. 

Love is revealed. 

Day 6 is here. 

My cell phone buzzes.

"See you tomorrow."

Longing confirmed. 

Grit and sun are holding hands.

Porterville. 

Reconnecting, 

A game of scandal on cards.

Best job ever. 

Siblings unhinged. 

Windy car rides; young at heart.

Frozen adulthood. 

Pile of treats at home.

Favorite foods on the stove. 

Mom is nowhere found. 

Laptop whirring

Ambiguous calendar. 

Shorter days to come. 

Hands clammy with sweat.

Voices feeding through headphones.

Ownership transferred.